Everyone has them.
Maybe you realize when you wake up. When you’re brushing your teeth. Maybe it’s in the shower or when you bend down to tie your shoes before heading off to work.
You are squishy today.
I don’t like using the word “fat” because it implies that there’s something wrong with my body (and my body is pretty fantastic, because it’s all heathy and workable and all my attached appendages function pretty well). So I use the word squishy.
“Squishy” is when you feel less than par. You’re batting a pretty low average today. Things aren’t sitting the way they’re supposed to. It’s when you look in the mirror and think:
“Oomph. We are not up to scratch, guys. We’ve had better days.”
I’m all for body positivity, and I try to practice it as much as possible. But not admitting that we all have off days isn’t body positive at all. My squishy days usually happen during a bad week. Recently I’ve been traveling a lot and I’ve been busy with extended work hours. I haven’t had any time to run or practice yoga aside from basic meditation (so helpful!).
I used to have a crazy-fast metabolism, so much so that my parents nicknamed me “Chicken Legs” when I was little. I was a little bit underweight and very active. As I matured, calmed down, and learned to eat right, puberty also happened, and I grew up. I now have a healthy proportion of body fat, and I’m working on building my muscles and endurance and flexibility. I don’t really care what I look like so much as I care that my body is working at optimum health.
I want to take care of it because it’s only body I get, and I’ve learned to like it. Maybe not love it all the time, but we’re pretty good friends, my body and I. Aside from the occasional zits, my body pretty much rocks, because I experience the world through it.
But today…admittedly, today I’m having a squishy day.
So if you’re like me and having a squishy day, where you don’t feel bad but don’t exactly feel awesome either, here’s some encouragement for you:
“What Girls are Made Of:
Do not let him tell you that your mouth is made for kissing.
Your mouth is made for the articulate frenzy of revolution, for the
Crisp shape of kindess, for lurching picket
Lines and your
Solitary war cry in a law school classroom.
Do not let him
Cradle your jaw in his audacious hands and
Tell you that your mouth is anything
Less than the soft and violent
Devastation of water, stirring.
The next sentence you begin with “I”
Don’t you dare let it end in “love you.”
(If anyone knows who wrote that, let me know!)
“And now that you don’t have to be perfect, you can be good.” (John Steinbeck)
(If you’re looking for more music, I have a playlist on Spotify titled “RSL” that has other tracks that make me feel good! Feel free to suggest some!)
And this last quote sums up how I feel about people who refuse dessert:
Cakes have gotten a bad rap. People equate virtue with turning down dessert. There is always one person at the table who holds up her hand when I serve cake. No, really, I couldn’t, she says, and then gives her flat stomach a conspiratorial little pat. Everyone who is pressing a fork into that first tender layer looks at the person who declined the plate and they all think, that person is better than I am. That person has discipline.
But that isn’t a person with discipline; that is a person who has completely lost touch with joy. A slice of cake never made anybody fat. You don’t eat the whole cake. You don’t eat a cake every day of your life. You take the cake when it is offered because the cake is delicious. You have a slice of cake, and what it reminds you of is some place that’s safe, uncomplicated, without stress. A cake is a party, a birthday, a wedding. A cake is what’s served on the happiest days of your life.
I hope you feel less squishy today! And if you don’t…there’s always tomorrow!